Life IS Change

Well, within 6 months I have to be graduated, have a license, and then GET A LIFE! I'm planning on moving out of South Carolina and into Indiana!  I'll be rooming with a dear dear friend.... after saying goodbye to me dear friends and family from SC... We are planning to have 6 months together then she'll leave to marry her fiance! Meanwhile I'll be really working toward getting graduated and then I'll pack my things and move on out.... To my dear friends out there, please be praying for me that I might be able to do this.... I've never lived outside of SC, so this is a big step for me.... And saying goodbye to my family and friends will be hard....

Also, lately, depression has gripped it's ugly claws over my heart.... I need prayers that I'll get through this... I definitely don't want to be as whiny as Bella from Twilight.... I'm not falling into that deep of a depression though.... but I'm doing a lot of stupid things to cope.....I found another reason why I can't have caffeine...... now there's a physical aspect to it...... After finding that out though..... I got more along with something that I KNEW had another bad physical reaction after eating it.... sugar! I am coping with things that could really bring me down.....and the last time I allowed all my cravings to take over me, I became a monster!

And another thing..... I feel a little uplifted today, now that I went to church..... I worshiped God and learned something about The Bread of Life! I feel stronger now that I went.... even though I'm still a wee bit weak. I feel like I can fight another day after so long of feeling like I could never fight! I was crippled and believing myself incapable of standing up.... but God gave me the strength to overcome and now I feel strong!

I have felt awful weak and then I've gained strength..... a lot like this song:



THANKS BE TO GOD!!!!!! I am the Crippled Warrior..... I stand to fight back..... I am weak on my own..... but I am strong when He is near..... I am the Injured Challenger.... Getting back up is never easy.... But when I fight for Him.... I CAN BE STRONG IN HIM!!!!!!!!

Searching for the Crippled Warrior,
Mari J. Fahel

Chocolate Syrup to Top the Nutty Sundae

**walks in with cowboy hat on** Yup, I've gone awesome.... **tips hat to a man** Whoops too weird, eh? **throws hat off**  I should be in bed.... x3 but I am struggling with meself too hard to sleep! **twiddles with shirt** Well, today was one of those epic days.... My buddy ol' pal, Eli made himself his very own personal blog! Congratulate him on his success over there, guys! Also, I talked to one of me good, good friends.... she told me a story she had written.... IT WAS HILARIOUS!

Also, I'm getting back into anime.... I can join me anime buddies again to just rant about how Gaara's creepy ways turned to the silent gentlemen he had become. WOOHOO!!!! Then we can rant about how Kyo and Yuki are always at it HAH! THEN we can rant about how there should be a Scotland in Hetalia awh maaaan!

Then there's my 6-month dedication to "The Guardian's Chorus".... I have decided to take a break on November for.... **drumroll please** NaNoWriMo!!!!!! Ja, guys I'm aiming to finish this time! With the caffeine, perseverance, and just a little touch of being mad, I shall finish this 50,000-word novel! Cross yer fingers, boys and girls!

Oh and so far, the cherry has not been placed on top of me sundae, but I'm sure it don't matter! God's stopped putting the nuts in and now is putting chocolate syrup (it symbolizes the feeling of being in love.... yup I'm falling in love).... hahaha Well, in actuality I'm not too sure the chocolate syrup is a good thing.... I'm finding myself catching eyes with every guy I meet.... and finding SOMETHING I like about their looks.... haha oh dear..... I was always a bit of a weakling when it came to cute guys but C'MON! This ain't funny, people! Don't ye DARE laugh at me!!!!!!!! Also... there's this guy...... I mean **ahem** he's cool.... and doesn't know I like him....shhhh I'm falling in love with him.... and that's bad! The guy is sooo cute.... I'm not saying names cuz I dunno if he's reading this, but he's too cute! haha!

Today, I've been hearing whispers (that of my own making) that are telling me of my past and deeds that fell apart.... All I've got to say to that is:




Preferring to look insane,
Mari J. Fahel

P.S. Don't ye DARE steal my chocolate! <333

"Awh... poor wee lamb..."

Don't worry, people! I still live! I have returned to the blogging world and am in the midst of writing a book with my dear friend, Eli! The book is titled The Guardian's Chorus! Eli's editing and writing in the story! I'll allow ye to read a wee bit of it, ladies and gentlemen!

A little girl crawled into the brushes with her thick stick in her hand as she heard the marching of an older boy. As she crawled closer to the sounds of his marching a snap of a twig quitted the deliberate steps, which made the tween boy chortle, “Now, what could that have been?”

The little girl giggled and stood up and screamed, “CHARGE!” and charged after the boy who lifted his stick and blocked hers.


They whacked at the sticks as the girl tried her best to hit this older boy when a stern voice made her jump, “Kaitra Joy!”


The little girl froze in her movements as the boy froze as well. The two of them stood up straight and turned to the woman with her hands on her hips.


“Young lady, how many times have I told you not to duel with your cousin!” the woman eyed the little girl with a firm face.


“Countless times, Aunt Isobel...”


“That’s right... how many more times will I have to tell you?” Aunt Isobel then turned to the boy, “And Jacob... you should know better... Kaitra is a young lady and shouldn’t be dueling with you!”


“Sorry, Mum...” replied the boy in a mumble, “I’ll throw the sticks out...”


“You do that... and then go out with your father to town...” Aunt Isobel turned back to the teary-eyed girl, and kindly said, “Kaitra, I have a surprise for you... Come with me...”


Kaitra sighed and followed her aunt out of the wooded area towards the cabin. Kaitra stood there, awaiting her “surprise”. Which Aunt Isobel pulled out, it was underneath a cloth which she unveiled, it was a highland whistle.


Kaitra’s eyes brightened, “Really?”


“Yes, Kaitra... you can thank your Uncle for this. Go on and play it!” she handed the whistle to her niece.


She snatched it away and blew gently, letting the note reverberate through the air, “It’s beautiful!”


“Yes, well... I must get back to mending...”


That day was the start of something new in Kaitra’s life, to be a smith of notes and a painter of sound. She didn’t know how much it would affect her life.

Leave comments, people! And let me know how ye like it! I wrote this part... ;-)

Preferring to look insane,
Mari J Fahel

A Song for a Friend

I love you, Beloved Sister.... I know you are going through a lot.... but remember this and have hope and faith in the impossible <333 it's not a feeling it's a state of being <3333

Preferring to look insane,
Mari J. Fahel

Disorderly and Proud

One of the advantages of being disorderly is that one is constantly making exciting discoveries ~A.A Milne~

Well, lately I've been making cool discoveries of my own. And I wanted to relay some of them... We found a bag and it had some cameras inside it a video one and a film one.... It makes me wanna take them and use them... Even if their old! HAH! I also spent some time watching Fireproof.... the end is my favorite part!

I also have rediscovered a spiritual gift that lay dormant for a little while... I exhorted a friend and I am not only feeling at peace and joyful, but I want to worship God! :-D

I also want to remind you guys of this one thing... By one song! <3333



Remember that! Even the hardest heart can break and be changed! <3333

Preferring to look insane,
Mari J. Fahel

Mr. Mirror

I wrote a poem today called "Mr. Mirror". The whole point to the poem is that the mirror lies and God never lies.... I wrote it with the hope that someone would read it and not like it for the words written nor the rhythm of the poem.... but would like it for the message that I was trying to get across....

Hello there, Mr. Mirror
I know you whisper words and tips
So where could this go wrong?

Hello there, Doctor Lover
I desired fools
But now I see these words and tips
Will start to eat my soul

Dear Father, God above
Backs were turned to You
Even though Your still small voice
Is what we longed from You

Dear Jesus Christ, in me
I longed to know You
But every time I tried to
I chased what was untrue

Hello there, Mr. Mirror
Decision was made
I will not let your words and tips
Compromise this good trade

Hello there, Doctor Lover
I traded your lies
For a Greater Truth from my Lord
My house you can’t come by!

Dear Father, God above
I am ever Yours
Take me along Your lovely beach
So I can wade ashore

Preferring to look insane,
Mari J. Fahel

You May Not Know This But...

Today is the only day we can make decisions.... Yesterday is gone and tomorrow isn't guaranteed... and we always act like tomorrow is gonna come all the time and yesterday needs peeking at once more. Look everyone today is a gift! If you want less time looking at past wrongs and fearing the future... keep your head in the game! Life is amazing and each day you  make decisions they all have consequences... Remember that God gave you your breath for today and remember that He can quit your heart right now... be grateful for the blessed present that you have received! You've got many blessings and even the poorest man is blessed... Just Remember that before you turn to face the past and make decisions for tomorrow.... tomorrow never comes we only got now!

Preferring to look insane,
Mari J. Fahel